When the Waiting Ends

 I have less than one week left of summer vacation. 

One week to soak up time with my kids before I step into a new season I thought wouldn't come for a few more years- if ever. 

Back in January, I wrote about holding dreams tightly in the heart and loosely in the hands. In the midst of a Bible study with friends, I had come to the point of accepting I may never serve families and children with special needs in the capacity I desired again. I had come to the point of saying, "Volunteering for Buddy Break may be where I serve. I'll show my kids how we love on these families. I'll let you (Lord) use me where you will. You gave me this heart for these families. Lead me to where I should go and guide me in how to serve. Help my heart to be content in this season."

Fast forward to April sometime. I was sitting with my dear friend, sipping lattes at our favorite spot, enjoying our once weekly coffee date. Special ed came up (naturally, as she's a teacher). The conversation went on and she said, "You should come work at the school!" I laughed... She was serious. I agreed I'd be open to a conversation regarding it.

So, the discussions with the Principal began. I was blown away by how God had literally dropped this opportunity in my lap. He was providing me with the job I have dreamed about from the time I was in 8th grade, when the Lord revealed to me Special Ed was where my heart would be. Right before me was an opportunity to resource students and their families. A chance to resource and support teachers in the classroom, helping them make accommodations to serve all of their students well. And it was a part-time gig...that slowly evolved over the last couple of months to full-time!

I have learned somethings about myself through this process: 

1. I'm definitely the person who cries easily. As I watch God do his thing, I am overwhelmed with joy and gratitude. He has graciously made a way for me to be a stay-at-home mom for nearly 6 years. Now, He graciously brought me into an opportunity to serve students and families with learning disabilities or challenges. And my response has been to cry, joyfully, thanking God for this gift.  
2. I'm passionate about the students and teachers. I am most excited to work with the students/families AND the teachers. Why? Simply put, every kid deserves a team of people who will fight for and support them. Providing even the simplest of accommodations can speak volumes to a student and their family. Having an open-door to communication with students and parents shows them they're an important piece. 
3. This is what I was made to do. It won't be perfect, rainbows and roses. There will be hurdles. There will difficult situations. The difference is, I know the Lord has called me into this. He did, after all, bring me right to it. While the process has had me ask the question, "Is it worth it," the Holy Spirit has gently reminded me walking in this calling isn't always easy, but I choose do it anyway. God alone will pave the way and equip me. 

I am excited, nervous, and counting down the days, all while soaking in the remaining summer days with my kids. I'm preparing to teach Math and English. I'm preparing to work with students, teach them how to be self-advocates, love God, and do their best. I'm looking forward to having colleagues who care about their students and working with people who also love God. I'm thrilled to be working in the same school my own kids will be attending- I won't have to miss anything! 

I'm overwhelmed, still taking it in, as I look back and see how God was at work the whole time I wrestled. He knows the desires and passions of my heart. 

He is a faithful, good, and kind God. He placed teachers in my life who taught me and helped cultivate this passion; teachers I can now share this joy with! And now, He is equipping me to step into a new season- a season where the waiting to serve ends. A season where I will still have to exercise my dependence on Him, while walking into this gift He's given me. 

He is faithful in the waiting. He is faithful in the harvest. Jesus is more than enough.

"Therefore, my dear friends, as you have always obeyed—not only in my presence, but now much more in my absence—continue to work out your salvation with fear and trembling, for it is God who works in you to will and to act in order to fulfill his good purpose." Philippians 2:12-13 NIV